Imaginary Gardens

They come with the whole thing, like rats-"*


Today was pretty shitty in that the garage door seems to be locked from the inside or in some way that means that I cannot open the person-sized door and do not have the key for the lift-the-whole-thing-up-for-the-car door. Which meant that I couldn't get my bike. Cue a walk to two music stores (both of which were closed, the motherlovers) and then over 3 km in high heels (and almost instant blisters) to Biology building to see what papers I need to get together for my graduation (slated for Jan. 26, whoot!). Said papers basically include a transcript written out by me (because gods forbid the university can do such a thing). Then there was more walking to another building for an unofficial transcript because I have no idea what courses I've taken. With more blisters. Then there was the walking back. (While yes, I have walked around in tourist-mode with blisters on the soles of my feet the diameter of mandarins, I have not yet grown accustomed to the horrible burning sensation of layers of my skin rubbing off of each other and filling with interstitial fluid. I don't know, man, call me weak but, ow.)

Then home for lunch (fooooood!) and wrestling with a cardboard box bearing random papers where I could, with luck, find my examination cards because yes my backwater university sends out grades on bright green little cards and then there was the wrestling of the suitcase out from under my bed which while not as bad as this nightmare was flippin' hard because I can't lift a queen-or-whatever-size bed with one hand and pull out a person-sized suitcase with the other without straining something.

Then I wrote so many holiday cards I started writing stupid things in them or making gods-awful drawings and I am so, so sorry if you get one like that. And my supervisor replied that he wouldn't be in town for my graduation and therefore can't be at the ceremony and give a tiny little mini-speech (which I need someone to do, as per graduation requirements) so I'm going to ask my previous internship's supervisor which is okay but fills me with woe. Also spoke with Mom and a travel-tired brother, who's just arrived in Rome. Mom was all a-squee because she's got plates and a tablecloth and everything! (All of our furniture and stuff is in shipping-limbo until around next week. Yays.)

Tomorrow will involve photocopying and printing of important papers, purchasing of a present for my brother and head-wringing over what to get my dad, then some DVD-burning for other presents. I may work on the lion mane article but frankly I want to just let it die (at least until I get back in January) because I am so burnt out from article-writing. I might also struggle with Adobe and try to get it to convert a word document to a pdf one without fucking up the page size when I'm totally telling it what size to use.

Wow, I'm coming off way more aggravated than I am. I'm not. I'm just...gah.


Video of the Day: Pastor ranting against Pokemon - I don't know whether to laugh hysterically or flip him the biggest bird of all time. ( Embedded )


Links of the Day:
Supernatural: ( Read more... )
Random: ( Read more... )


Moving Pictures, TPratchett

Yesterday I talked to my dearest, darlingist muffin Kit-kat for like two solid hours and it was \o/ with an extra dash of squee. We talked mainly about life and the future and social things and it's kinda freakish how alike we are, sharing the same worries and fears and the like. Love ya, muffin ♥

The presentation didn't go terribly bad, I mean, I talked too fast and skipped a lot of things I'd meant to say and failed at explaining a few things, but in general it went alright. So \o/ on that then.

After the presentation, I hung out with Willy! Which is definitely \o/ We had lunch and talked about school and boys and life and The Future and squeefull things like her beau coming to visit all the way from Kenya and had a grand ol' time.

I'd meant to finish writing the Dean&Icarus coda tonight, but I had Glühwein and watched Dylan Moran's show instead. Ah, the joy! I adore Dylan and his unruly hair :D And now I'm off to read tracy_loo_who's And I Will Walk on Water (Dean/Castiel, Realistic Hurt/Comfort with Plot), because I am so addicted to it.

So life's pretty alright, even though point-blank questions of "Are you happy" get a negative response and my knees hurt for no flippin' reason (ow). I've got to get my final thesis PDF approved tomorrow, then it's all printing and binding and database fixing. I also think I might have a meeting with my supervisor (although we never set a time) and I want to snag some "this is where you may find gainful employment" advice (i.e. the "what the hell am I good for?" question).


Video of the Day: Dylan Moran's show What It Is, live (part 1) ( Embedded )


Links of the Day:
Supernatural: ( Read more... )
Doctor Who: ( Read more... )
Random: ( Read more... )


* Dylan Moran, What It Is

Studies: So cleaning up databases is utterly boring, no news there. Gah.

Post-Nano: I've written one line for the missing scene, and while I like it, it seems out-of-character for Future!Dean and I'm all stumped now. Like, that one line is this great big wall and I can't chisel my way around it, and I don't want to tear it down 'cause it's got such pretty wallpaper. *head!desk* Maybe it's hard to write because Dean's pissed off and Icarus isn't responding? *throws hands in the air* I don't know. I'm just going to soldier through it. Double-gah.

On the plus side, I think I've got the fanmix songlist all figured out.


* Anon. or uncredited

Life: Let's see, achievements... Wrote up heroes_meta, did laundry, bought booze. Yes, booze. Specifically, Glühwein, which I was shocked to find in the sueprmarket but overcame said shock and purchased with glee.

Actually worked on thesis today (on a weekend, I know!). Just some photoshopping of graphs to not make them squishy. \o/

Watched a lot of Black Books episodes, which make me laugh hysterically and almost die from lack of oxygen. There seem to be 6 episodes per season, though. Ah, English television, you so strange. Still, you guys should totally check the show out.

Also, am bored because there's no one on the internet. *pout*

Nano: Have realized why I now think it sucks and I hate it. I'm burnt out, that's what it is. (Also, maybe staying up until 2 or 3 in the morning isn't very good for me.)


Links of the Day:
Supernatural: ( Read more... )
Random Fandom:
southoffebruary's Picspam True Blood's Alexander Skarsgård


* Black Books

Life: Meeting with Supervisor was had. I was a ball of nerves. Things went well regardless. I now have a date for a colloquim presentation. We are not amused.

Fandom: Watched the Fall special of Doctor Who. Ow, my hearts. The Quote of the Day sums it all up nicely. I think the Doctor was a bit of a gigantic moron in his choice of date-and-location at the end, but maybe that was on purpose because he's the Doctor and he can do anything, damnit. The preview for the next specials filled me with joy \o/ Oh, familiar faces, how I've missed you!

Nano: Still missing 227 words, but it's 2 fucking am and I can't sit at this computer anymore. Fucking bastard of a novel with hard-to-write action scenes and an angel who keeps pushing back his appearance. Icarus, boy, get your ass in here right now!

( Excertp )

26455 / 50000 words. 53% done!

Quote of the Day: tommx, on Doctor Who's "The Waters of Mars", here

For a while I was thinking "This isn't quite what I expected...I thought it'd be better." Then I started cheering...then I sat in horror.

Links of the Day:

Doctor Who "The Waters of Mars" Reviews and more ( Read more... )
Supernatural: ( Read more... )
Random Fandom ( Read more... )


* commodoresexual, The Five Year Plan, Part 3

Today's work on the thesis was very much like banging my head against a wall. Progress is measurable only in snail, slug, sloth or plant communities. Every few seconds I had to go bother the prof who's holding my hand through the whole Access and ArcGIS learning experience, and to make matters more aggravating, the program was fond of giving me the finger (which in program speak is "I can't find the tools you just installed!" or "Oop! Memory error! We gotta shut down the program!" or "Aha! I have tricked you with my multiple tabs!"). Woe.

In other news, I bought makeup. Not for any noraml reason, but rather for Halloween. You know, to get dressed up although I have nowhere to go dressed up, or anyone to go with. (Partly because I fail and haven't called anyone. Okay, that's probably a big reason.) Also I am not lame enough to go about my day dressed up, October 31st notwithstanding. Items include white water-based theatrical thingy (for that "Look! I'm dead!" look), shimmery eyeshadow (because I will both embrace and mock Twilight by fucking sparkling), a kohl stick (apparently necessary for "the goth look") and red lipstick (the kind of red I'd call "Harlot"), which is actually making me squee on general terms because I've never had red lipstick. Add plastic canines, and you've got my usual Halloween constume. (Except for last year, where I was a gypsy, because I couldn't whip up anything else.)

Brainage of the Day: Lara Logan, CBS News Chief Foreign Correspondent, on The Daily Show (June 17, 2008) ( Read more... )


Links of the Day: ( Read more... )


* "New Soul", Yaël Naïm (YouTube: Music Video)

Yesterday night was pretty fantastically awesome because Gabrielle had invited me to a little chill-out at her place before we all went to Einstein's. It was the usual gang - us two, the two italians and the french guy - plus a new girl called Jodi who's from Texas and is very sweet as well. So we had student-version pizzas (mini-pitas with pizza toppings) and Kir (or is it Kier?), which was wine with creme de cassis (blackcurrant liquor) and most excellent. I had a very good time :)

Of course, I went to sleep ages late and, considering my recent track record waking up, I totally missed out on a productive morning. I had a sandwich before going to work (on account of omgnofoodinnahouse), by which time it was past noon. I redid the t-test for some indices (but the "Look! Of course they're significant! They've got the maximum value!" points are still...not) and emailed my brother about it. We've been going back and forth about it a bit, and while no progress has been made, it's nice to have some help and insightful questions thrown my way.

And then I did nothing. Seriously, I've been craptastic today, horrendously unable to work or focus or anything. It also doesn't help that I have a frustrated hormononal rage on the low burn which, if left unchecked, will in fact morph into the wibbles. This means I'm currently easily distracted and unfocused and two steps away from a sputtering teary rage. *head-desk* I don't know what to do.

Imma go home now.


( Meme: Which Tarot Card Are You? )


Links of the Day:

Supernatural: ( Read more... )

Random Fandom - Icons: ( Read more... )

Random Fandom: ( Read more... )

Random: ( Read more... )

Access and Statistics: ( Read more... )


* Anon. or uncredited.

I didn't go running yesterday on account of the torrential rain and my being tired and hungry. I watched Heroes, was disappointed, had more for dinner that I ought've, and failed to do anything or even go to sleep at a reasonable time.

Today is coming along splendidly (if by "splendid" we mean "crap"). Woke up late, as always, and felt like I was a zombie just crawling out of its grave for the first time. Breakfast was lame because I failed to buy honey yesterday, so I had toast with...Nesquick. It didn't work.

At work I started going through the a professor's Access and ArcGIS handbook again from where I left off in June. It didn't go well. I managed to figure out what I'd done all those months ago and to write up a query, which is part one of the first exercise I tackled. But then it came time to saving the table and I had no idea how to. The handbook didn't help. The .ppt presentation didn't help. I was left staring at instructions which said, broadly speaking, "And then stuff happens!"

It's like someone giving you instructions on how to build a house, saying, "First you do the foundations. And remember to use only reinforced walls," and at first you think, "Oh, swell, I can do that, easy," but once you're staring at the half-dug hole they left you, wondering whether you should use the shovel or a bulldozer - oh my gods where the hell is the bulldozer?!? - and staring at the sofa you brought along which will now only get ruined because you have no idea when you'll be able to move in and you've already sent out all the house-warming invitations...

So instead I've been working on the prey species density data, which is horrible and just a mess of half-done excel sheets. I'm drowning in data! And none of the stuff I did months ago makes any sense and it may even be calculated wrong but ye gods I ain't doing it again oh please shoot me now...


Links of the Day:
makesmyheadspin's True Blood Series, WIP
ashdood's SPN Fanvid Where The Story Ends (Sam, Dean)
literaryquotes's Inherit the Stars by James P.Hogan
zqfans's Zachary Quointo Interview Re: Star Trek
Thirteen Real Animals Lifted Directly From Your Nightmares
Nanaimo Bars: Original Recipe ; Ultimate Recipe


* Sam Winchester, Supernatural

I've just lost four hours of work comprising of two identification sheets covering eleven observations, I'm working on a pathetically slow computer that took about half an hour to cough up the VLC program and my mouse finger is basically crying in a corner.

To add to that, I've been extremely late to work this week and, at Einstein's on Wednesday, bumped into Elisa who said she needs to talk to me and that she'll call me, or I can call her, which is upsetting in the "Doom! Dooom!" sense and also in the "If you want to talk to me, you call me (as well you could have before bumping into me by chance)."

Also I'm eating half a Kitkat (or maybe the whole thing), have been having mad cravings, can't seem to lose weight and my period just went peek-a-boo and then retracted in a way that is totally not normal.

Additionally, I finally wrote that email I was avoiding and have yet to get a response and I'm making a very conscious decision out of respect for the emailee to not discuss this on LIvejournal (yet) but by gods I could've used some talking.

Lastly, my Links of the Day backlog is long and horrible.

But mainly I'm pissed as all hell that I've just lost four hours of work that cost me a few years of life off my hands and eyes. Fuck.


* Common expression (and part of Kit-Kat catch-phrase).

Yesterday was my meeting with my supervisor. For the first time since I've started writing this thesis, I didn't feel like I'd gone through the "Grr! You suck!" grinder and didn't feel like crying. In truth, it went pretty well. Sure, the only thing he had to say was thing's I ought to fix or add too (there's always something more to add), but at least he was thoroughly impressed with my list of identified lions for Ambogga's pride and understood that a) this took aaaages and b) was necessary for one third of my results.

I did, as in every meeting, have to tell him that two lionesses are no longer in the same pride. I know he's busy, but come on, we've discussed this every meeting and it was in my emails and field report when I was in Kenya. For the love of cuddly things! why is he always surprised when I tell him they're in two groups?!?

He also told me something which needs a bit of who's-who for y'all to understand without me doing horribly convoluted run-on sentences. *re-reads* Like that one. Anyway, so this project has a couple of counterparts in Kenya, both in the Kenya Wildlife Services. One's going to be the PhD student who's going to tangle with all this research we're doing to make some sense out of it. Supervisor and Future-PhD, along with others, were involved in re-collaring the lions this summer. They also collared a new lioness (which I hope to gods I can identify, 'cause that'd be awesome).

Future-PhD's decided to name the lioness "Willemijn" which is a) Supervisor's daughter's name (the same daughter I went to Kenya to do research with), b) demonstrably unpronounceable by all Kenyans we ever met (Willy-muh-jeen, or Willy-muh-jin were the closest tries, when it's Will-uh-mine), c) in bad taste (as in, giving a lion a Dutch name, nevermind that it's a researcher's). Supervisor was displeased with the choice name due to reason c, but understands Future-PhD's logic in the political sense by using reason a. I'm peeved over all three reasons, frankly, but mainly c. Although I must admit I felt a pang of disappointment and confusion because, as even my Supervisor says (not that I raised this issue at all), between the two of us, I deserve to have a lion named after me more than Willy (what with being the lion researcher and all). I'm not saying I'd like a lion named after me (gods no), just that, if you take out the "daughter of" part, (twisted) logic says it ought to have been my name there.

Anyway, the rest of the work that day went well. Except, of course, for the last part at 5:20 pm where I did a final save of a lion's ID sheet, ready to end for the day, and the computer threw up errors all over the place. Some error boxes and an unsolicited re-start later, I could not find a single mother-lovin' trace of my ID sheet. This ID sheet represented the main body of work for the entire day, so you'll understand why my hand was glued to my mouth and I made high-pitched whimpering sounds. Eventually, an hour later, I found a temporary file that had most of my work on it. But seriously! this computer's going to kill me (and delete my entire work). I wasn't even saving to the computer anyway, but to my USB. Argh.

This whole mess meant my nerves were screaming bloody murder and I only had half an hour between getting home and going swimming. Whilst biking to the pool, I moved from "strict right" to "slightly in the middle" to avoid a pothole, heard a motorbike beep behind me, moved back to the right and saw the motorbike pass me. The woman sitting behind the driver turned around and yelled at me (ah, how I loved at times not really understanding Dutch). She seemed quite infuriated and was probably yelling insults galore. All I know is that she gestured at my headphones, as if to say, "What the fuck, you dumb fuck with your headphones, you deaf?!?" It really upset me because I'm a good biker (signaling, keeping to my side and waiting at pedestrian crossings in a country where bikers feel they have the right of way on the sidewalk as much as anywhere else, for example) and had done nothing wrong or dangerous (unless, of course, they were being utter morons and trying to pass a bike at ridiculous speeds). Fuck, the number of times I've almost crashed because the person I was trying to pass just decided to do a little s-shaped wobble! Right, so that was upsetting, particularly because I was already upset. So the day ended nicely.

Oh, wait, it ended with a talk with mom. That went generally well except where we disagreed over what "urgently" meant. She said I had to start sending out CVs urgently and I disagreed, because I don't know when I might finish this thesis and have yet to research where I could send the CVs to. So for me, it's not urgent in the "drop everything right the fuck now and do this shit!" sense of the word. And for my mom, "It's not urgent" translated to "I'm never going to even try to get a job, lalala."

Today I've worked 6.5 hours straight and had lunch at 5:30 pm. My neck's killing me. I had one (1) oreo cookie as consolation. I have, however, basically finished identifying and analysing one whole pride. \o/ Still a few holes, but I'm ready to move on to another one. I also have to write a report about my internship to the International Office lady (the one who thought I was going to be raped and murdered in Kenya, remember her?). I'd meant to do that now, but instead wrote this. What the hell, I'm tired. Also, no running or swimming today (and definately no Einstein's), so I'm going to chill.


Links of the Day: ( Read more... )


* Shoggoth's Old Peculiar, NGaimain