I've been thinking about going to therapy recently...*

[bending_sickle]

...due to the fact that I have just been violently freaking out lately.*

I haven't done anything yet. I'm in a bit of a panic, like underneath my skin everything's sort of vibrating at a very angry and freaked-out frequency. Also feel queasy. Going to Leiden later this evening to check out a room - and be checked out - so hope that goes well. (However, panic? Why hallo there.) Work is not progressing at the desired rate and this is starting to be very bad indead.

*fail-flail*

Oh, I don't know if it's weird coincidence or what, but last weekend my entire significant family (Ma, Dad, and Brother) called me. You could almost taste the concern! (If you have a discerning palate and were raised on grits.) Dad, oblivious man that he is, got quite a shock when I told him honestly that no, I don't have anyone. Well, maybe one friend. And a half. He was all, "But you've done this before!" Which is a lie, a filthy, filthy lie, because before I had school and people I saw on a regular basis. Now, I don't. So making friends is a bit harder when there's no contact. Mamaji's coming over in less'n 2 weeks. This is good, bad and ugly. (Why can't she be a motherly-mother more often?) Dad'll be round too. I'm going to end up blubbering all over lunch while they stare on at me uncomprehending, aren't I? (Yeah, I've done that before.) And I'll try to explain or have normal conversations of the life-altering-decision kind and it'll go down like a giant manatee on a pile of jello. And nothing will be resolved. *hangs head* Someone just take me home and give me tea and cuddles, please.

*continues to panic whilst not doing anything at all*

ETA: Track 10 for The Waiting Lounge of Airports: "Home" by Michael Buble? Or should I just leave it the hell alone?
ETA2: Yeah, I ought to just leave it alone. It's all about going back rather than leaving, which breaks the theme.


Links of the Day:
BBC News: Elephants used to film tigers
BBC News: Chihuahua prays at Budhist temple
45eugenia's Fanvid: Doctor Who Trailer of utter, utter win
wtf_nature's real-live hellmouth post
vail_kagami's Fanfic:Tap the Rhythm (Doctor Who, Ten/Master)
james_nicoll's post linking to proof of an alternate dimension where Firefly is evil and misognistic and simplistic. Only follow the link if you want death-by-desk.
unfeathered's Fanfic: Master Plan, Part 1, which I will read, I promise
My bookmark for get_medieval (i.e. I am here)


* I Was a Teenage Billionaire Psychopath by Jeffrey J. Rowland**
** Not such a bad idea, actually. If I could manage coherency for an extended period of time, of course. And I have the wonderful yet unhelpful ability of managing to be all cheery rosey wriggling-puppies when in the face of people, and of making light of - or succinctly stating - things, which when put like that seem incredibly simple and "Omg, you're freaking out over that?", that makes me think maybe face-to-face people wouldn't take me and my woes seriously if I set them forth. (Friends excepted, of course, because I'm allowed to be non-coherent with them, so things make more emotional-sense, if not linguistic.)

Comments

[lienne.livejournal.com]

*snuggles you bunches* ♥ I can't do the taking you home part, but I can definitely manage tea and cuddles, of the Internet variety! *gives* *petpets*

[bending-sickle.livejournal.com]

*slurps* *cuddles* *hands over a buttered scone*

[lienne.livejournal.com]

Om nom nom scone! :D

[blizzardcake.livejournal.com]

*cuddles*

*brews some tea and has some lemon slices, honey, sugar and cream on the side*

Here's a Tea Cup to complete the set: http://youtube.com/watch?v=YVEO2_LyUCs

=)

[bending-sickle.livejournal.com]

You and your weird lemon-in-tea fetish! (I forgive lemon in iced tea, though.)

Oh, and Gackt's Tea Cup? Gorgeous!