1: “Hey, Horse, what’s that you found there?” – “It’s a dragon, George. I think it’s dead.” – “Huh. Whaddya know.”
2: “It makes me sad. I think I will hug my helmet for a little while.”
3: “Well, Horse, what next?” – “Let’s grab a brew at Destino, eh?” – “Great idea, Horse.”
4: “Wait… that looks like a piece of lance in his side. Did I do that?” – “Maybe, George. Maybe you did.” – “Huh. Whaddya know.”
5: MINE FAÇADE IZ PASTEDE ON YEY
6: This looks like some cheap alphabet from a third-rate video game fantasy world.
7-8: If a tree falls in a flood and Jesus isn’t around to see it, is it really important?
9: Solar panels were much fancier back in the day…
10: Two words, baby: GEEK ICON.
11: MINE FAÇADE IZ BETTER THAN OTHER FAÇADE, YO.
12: Hands? Feet? Paws? WTF MODERN ART?
13: The world’s first Pendulum Clock allowed people to move forward and backward in time. It was, of course, too awesome to be allowed to survive.
14: It’s like a Croatian Mary Poppins.
15: Usually in these movies, those two folks go in through the gate and either never are seen again, or come out days later, changed in horrific ways.
16: Two car garage? Or five horse garage? We may never know.
17: Probably just fundraiser plaques. “This brick was made possible by a donation from Marko Jankovic and sons.”
18: And thus Mary became the Patron Saint of Firefighters.
19-20: He was also the first person to ever say “Serfs, up!” asking them to rise against their oppressors. Californians later perverted his catchphrase horribly.
21: Serbo-Croatian Ducks say “Kwakic”, only with more diacritical marks.
22-23: False flowers! Ia! Ia!
24-25: Freddie Mercury took that dude’s last words and turned them into a song, “Another One Bites The Dust.”
26: Let’s get a drink from a different fountain. This one’s too crowded.
27: I like how the theatre is more ornate than parliament. GOVERNMENT IS BORING YO DAWG AMIRITE?
28: Yellow makes this building look fat.
29: Looks like a statue, but is really a chair. Come on, ladies, sit in my lap!
30: “Lexicographical”? You just made that word up. I call shenanigans on you.
31: Tomasz the Croatian Tank Engine was probably made from real tanks. They don’t mess around in eastern Europe.
32: “And I, King Tomislav, am king because I own the only unicorn in Europe. BOOYAH!”
33: These yellow buildings get uglier with each iteration.
34: Well-manicured lawn, tall trees, fountain, no yellow… now we’re talking.
35: This explains why we never hear about “famous Croatian artists”.
36: “We try to make sure that only attractive women walk in front of our bank. It attracts customers who want to ‘make a deposit’, if you know what I mean.”
37: Actually, the symmetry of the triangle and the columns and the building comes together very nicely. Too bad the flags are off center. FLAG FAIL, DOODZ.
38: So the architectural must-see is a big stone wedding cake layer? DOUBLE FAIL.
39: Oh, I didn’t realize we were in Scotland now. I thought that was a wedding procession. Maybe they’re going to the Wedding Cake Fail Building thing.
40: …nope, that’s just too easy.
41: Oh KONY, why must you fool people everywhere?
42: There’s a terrible joke here about Olympic Anorexic High Diving, and… next picture please.
43: “You know, Horse, now that we’ve done it a few times, I think kicking dragon’s asses is kinda fun.” – “You’re right, George. There’s another one over there.” – “Bring it on!”
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