Gnaaaah, why do you have to inject more incertitude? But I have a feeling you're right about taking out the Angel of Punishment bit (even though I'm a bit in love with it) because it takes the reader a while to get to the "oh noes, there's something else! And there's Something Else!" and even longer to get to the actual "Angel of Punishment" label...
Curses! I'm taking your advice and going to stare at it for a while longer until I no longer pine for the last line (which damnit, does give away half the mystery and is therefore Not Good). Also, I'll be taking that cookie. *om noms*
And in return for said cookie, I have here a postcard with your name on it but no address because you had to go and move somewhere. Could you PM me your new address so I can continue the grand tradition of postcard sending?
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Curses! I'm taking your advice and going to stare at it for a while longer until I no longer pine for the last line (which damnit, does give away half the mystery and is therefore Not Good). Also, I'll be taking that cookie. *om noms*
And in return for said cookie, I have here a postcard with your name on it but no address because you had to go and move somewhere. Could you PM me your new address so I can continue the grand tradition of postcard sending?